First, I must say a big congratulations to you. It wasn't no easy step to reach this very stage of your life. By Tuesday, 5th of May, you would be entering the all famous NYSC Camp. For three weeks you would live, eat, sleep and even dream inside that camp. Now, these are the five top things I want you to know.
1). My brothers and sisters, please if you truly still love your life and that of your stomach too, I beg you with all the love I possess! Please do not, I repeat, DO NOT, eat the beans they will share during dining hours. Please do not try to eat it. Some of us that mistakenly ate it had some stories that touch to tell. Even if hunger is killing you, do not eat the camp beans. It was specially prepared to purge away the sins and sorrows inside your stomach.
2). Men and brethren, its no longer news that they steal even boxers inside NYSC camp. Truth is, someone's toothbrush was even stolen. Therefore, ensure that you sleep with your waist bag, also go to camp with an extra ghana must go bag that is empty. Use it and lock your buckets, soap, sponge, slippers etc. If not, you will end up buying uncountable number of buckets. When you are charging your phone, ensure that you STAY THERE. Don't beg another person to look after it for you... otherwise, you definitely love stories that touch.
3). I have already started pitying those posted to delta state lol. Truth is? That state has no toilet oo.. the early you prepare yourself physically on "advanced bush method," the better for you. Once you get to the camp ground, after your accreditation, please go and clear a land inside the bush as soon as possible. For the next 3 weeks, that is where you will be depositing manure. Most NYSC toilets are disastrous. For those that will be clearing their land in delta state, please don't match the manure some of us deposited years back lol.
4). My dear,while filling your registration form, there is a section where you will be
asked to fill in your hobbies. During our time, the rumor was that if you fill 'drilling oil', they will post you to oil company. If you fill 'counting money,' they will post you to a bank. Men and brethren I filled 'drilling oil' and I was sent to the remotest village to probably discover oil. Truth is? that thing doesn't work one bit. Prepare your mind to teach. If you are finally sent to drill oil? Cool. If not? Teach Responsibly lol.
5). For the guys? If you are not careful, your first allawi will finish inside the camp! Any girl you say "hiii" to will reply "hello" without wasting much time. She will lead you graciously to the mami market, morning, afternoon and night! If your name is Mr. Charity? continue! If your name isn't, my bro run for your life. Moreover, harp, star, origin and other beer brands will not be happy seeing you leave that camp with 1naira. They will host promos like drink 2 and get 1 free... in all, just be wise. Drink, eat, and act responsibly. Cheers! Happy camping!
intellectual property of Mr. Chukwuebuka
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