13 Signs You And Your Partner are Compatible

No two people are perfect match by nature. It’s absolutely normal for you to feel difficult sometimes, especially when you find a number of big differences between you and your partner. But that does not mean you are not compatible with your partner necessarily. There’re also a number of very important factors which determine for how long your relationship can last. Below are the 13 signs for reference for you to see whether you and your partner are compatible.

1. You don’t question the love in your relationship

You know you love your partner, and you know they love you – and there is no doubt in your mind about either of these things. You are secure and happy in your relationship, and even if you are a worrier by nature, you never question how your partner feels about you.

2. You know things about each other no-one else does

From your embarrassing stories to intimate details about your life, sharing secrets can show how compatible you and your partner really are. Honesty is important in a relationship, but actually wishing to tell them secrets shows your partner that you are truly invested in the relationship.

3. You enjoy spending time apart

When you start a great relationship, it can be hard to step away and spend some time alone. If you and your partner hope to be in a long term relationship, however, it is essential that you also enjoy spending time away from your partner. During such time you can see friends and family, or pursue interests of your own. If you love yoga and your partner hates it, try to take a class in your spare time!

4. You share common interests

While it is important to have your own hobbies and interests, compatible partners make the effort to spend time together doing things they both enjoy. Having common ground with a partner helps in long term relationships – from supporting the same team, to cooking together, to sharing a love of the same TV show.

5. You fight with each other

And you’re not afraid of it! If you tell your partner you disagree with them, they should listen to you and take you seriously. If they still don’t agree with you, that’s totally fine – because it’s just a disagreement, and it won’t change the way you feel about each other.

6. You want to work out serious problems

Often big issues can be raised in long term relationships, including money, religion, or where you both live. Most issues like these can be solved if the partners are compatible and are willing to compromise. It is important to work together until you reach a decision you’re both happy with – and for both people to be happy, it is likely that both have to compromise.

7. Your partner makes you want to be a better person

Although this sounds like a cliché, compatible couples keep pushing each other forward. Whether you are learning how to cook a new dish, or getting a promotion at work, your partner should always have your back and support you, and vice versa.

8. You can both imagine a future together

While you don’t need to be picking out wedding invites, it is always useful to be on the same page as your partner. Having different interests isn’t a problem; your partner could love travelling and you could aspire to get married and have children,, and you can do both. But if your partner doesn’t want to talk about a future together, it might be that you have different expectations from the relationship.

9. You can be yourself around your partner

If you and your partner are compatible, you should be able to truly be yourself whenever you are around them. Whether you feel happy, hyper, sad or angry, you should be able to comfortably express these emotions to your partner, without worrying about the consequences.

10. You’re attracted to each other

While sex obviously isn’t everything, it’s important to be physically intimate with your partner. From holding hands to kissing, compatible couples regularly show each other affection. In other words – there should be a spark, even if it is small!

11. You try to get along with each other’s families

If you genuinely love your partner’s family, that’s a great sign. Being in love with someone doesn’t always have to mean you love their family, though. And it’s fine if you don’t – but it isn’t fine if you don’t even try. Most people come with a family, and if your partner is going to be in your life for a long time, their family probably will be too.

12. You keep your relationship fresh

Everyone in the world is ageing, but that doesn’t mean their relationships have to age, too. Often work, having children and other responsibilities can side-line your relationship. These responsibilities are important and shouldn’t be neglected, but put aside some time to focus on your partner. Your relationship should always feel important.

13. You make the effort

Whether you and your partner have been together for 9 months or 9 years, it is always important to make an effort, from cooking classes to a kiss at the end of the day. After a long time together it can feel like these things are no longer necessary, but this could leave your partner unhappy.

Compatible couples often go the extra mile as it shows their partner they care, and can help to make them feel appreciated.

How Short Guys Are Better in Relationships ;)

First of all.....Go down low!! *in olamide's voice* hahahahahah

Secondly i am short :) (Some people might contest this fact)

According to Medical Daily, those below 5-foot-7 were considered to be ‘short men’ in 2009, while those over 6-foot-2 were considered tall.

Height is often seen as the physical depiction of capability and strength and power. For the shorter man suffering from stigma of the Napoleon complex, it is a challenge to measure up in terms of appeal to women. This is a result of the notion that a majority of women have the desire to feel fragile, petite and protected by a ‘dominant’ man. Taller men make women feel smaller, which appeals to those who are self-conscious about their size and weight. 

If you have taken the leap and disregarded the dominating stigma surrounding shorter men, congratulations! You have made the right decision o!! For the other ladies read on. These are only a few of the reasons why short men make wonderful partners. 

1. They are dedicated to their relationships.

Without the ‘tall’ status, they will put much more effort into trying to impress their partner personality-wise rather than having to work with any physical traits. A study conducted by New York University researchers concluded that in general, shorter men assist with more housework than taller men, and what wins attraction points more than a man who shares kitchen duty? No woman is going to complain about a man putting in a little extra effort. 

2. Finance will be less of an issue.

79% of men shorter than their significant other also tend to earn higher income, according to Medical Daily. While it is never okay to be a gold-digger, it is a bonus to be able to split house-hold expenses. This equals a less stressful and more harmonious relationship. 

3. You won’t have to stay up wondering where they are.

Findings by the Medical Daily indicate that short men have an 18% lowered rate of marriage due to the social stigma surrounding their perceived lack of masculinity. However, to those who do marry, the divorce rate is only 32%. This means that while it is somewhat difficult for a short man to get married, if you are open enough to see past the height boundaries, then you have just married yourself a dedicated man. A match like you is hard to find and they won’t be so willing to let you go. 

4. Some women enjoy feeling like models.

When the guy accepts that he’ll be shorter than you no matter what, it’s highly doubtful that they’re going to care about you wearing those gravity-defying heels you’ve always wanted to wear. Supermodels are taller and thinner than the average woman, so here’s your chance to feel like one! 

5. They love you regardless of your height.

This could be one of the most surprising findings of all. According to Psychology Today, men do prefer to be taller than their partners, however they care less about the height stigma than women do. So if you are a woman stressing about whether or not being taller than your man will interfere with the relationship, then chances are you are overreacting. 

After reading these, are you thinking of getting a short man as your partner? Read below, even celebrities are doing so! 

From Jamie Cullen (5’5”) and Sophie Dahl (6’0”) to Katie Holmes (5’9”) and Tom Cruise (5’7”), We can all recall these famous examples of taller women taking the leap with shorter spouses. The stigma doesn’t even stop with A-list celebrities, with Cullen himself admitting that he initially saw no chance with Dahl when they first met due to his height. 

9 Reasons not to Marry Your Boyfriend !!

Love is not always the best reason to marry someone. There are many other aspects of a person and relationship to look at before you decide to take this big step in your life. This article outlines ten reasons why you probably shouldn’t marry your boyfriend.

Girls pay attention to the FIRST one o!!:)

1. He is spending himself into debt

If your boyfriend is already in debt, this could be a warning sign of things to come, especially if he’s not working himself out of the debt. If he doesn’t care about his debt and is only getting himself further into debt, this is not something you should marry into. Once you get married, his debt will become your debt, too. Remember, the way your boyfriend spends money will affect you as well once you’re married.

2. Honesty Lacks In The Relationship
I think we can all agree that any great relationship is based on honesty. If you are uncomfortable sharing your thoughts and dreams with him, and if he is hiding a part of his life from you, the topic of marriage shouldn’t even come up. You can’t spend a lifetime afraid to express your feelings or wondering if he is straightforward with you. Marriage should be a commitment between two best friends, who hide nothing from each other no matter how awful it may be.

3. He is Controlling
A man, who wants to control every aspect of your life, might propose just to gain a firmer hold on your life. If your man is constantly dictating every aspect of your life and discouraging you from seeing your family and friends while you are dating, this is a red flag. Once you are married, and his “property” the isolation from family and friends will only increase until there is no contact with them. You have to be able to recognize the signs and avoid this nightmare. A proposal should be an act of unconditional love, not from the fear of losing you.

4. He Can’t Hold a Job

I don’t know about you, but I do not want a man that I have to support. I am not a sugar momma. If your man cannot hold a job or is not working toward a career, don’t enter into marriage with him. Of course, we all have had jobs that don’t work out, but if your man is constantly being fired or quitting jobs, you will probably be financially supporting him throughout the marriage. Remember there may be times when you can’t work due to pregnancy and childbirth, and if he can’t (or won’t) keep a job think about the predicament you will be in.

5. He Has an Alcohol or Drug Problem
If you are dating a man with an alcohol or drug problem, under no circumstances should you marry this man. No matter how much you love him marriage should never come up while he is addicted to any mind altering substance. Marriage to a substance abuser will hold nothing but heartache for you. You cannot fix or save him from himself, only he can do that, but you can save yourself the financial ruin and misery of marrying a man with an addiction problem.

6. You Fight Constantly
If you can’t settle your differences without engaging in full blown arguments and fights, now is not the time to get married. In fact, you will probably fight even more once you have the security of marriage. It is often said that your relationship is the best it is ever going to be when you are dating. Marriage is hard, even when you both love each other deeply and are committed to treating each other kindly. Learn how to work out your conflicts without resorting to fighting before you agree to get married.


7. You don’t go out on dates anymore

If you don’t go on dates and spend quality time with each other while you’re still officially dating, you definitely won’t go on dates once you’re married. If you want to have a life where you and your husband still date and spend quality time regularly, you have to get back into the habit now. If it isn’t something your boyfriend is into, you have to think about whether you can handle a life of never going on dates with your loved one again.

8. He proposed via text or email

Don’t excuse this behavior as being the modern way of doing things, it’s not. A proposal should always be something done in person, unless the other person is away fighting in a war or something equally important. Don’t lower your expectations because you hear that proposals are becoming lamer or non-existent.

9. He hasn’t met your family

You shouldn’t marry someone who won’t meet your family. There is no excuse these days for not meeting someone’s family. Even if your family lives far away, there are video chats, email and social networking sites they can meet through. This is a serious warning sign if your partner doesn’t want to meet or always setup road blocks to meeting your family. He should make every effort to meet your family before you get married.



Deciding to marry someone is a huge step in your life. You want to make sure it’s the right person. Look at your boyfriend’s actions today, and you’ll get a glimpse of what life will be like in the future. Don’t expect things to get better just because you have rings on your fingers

8 Ways a Guy Shows He loves You.

Place less weight on your man’s words and more weight on his behaviors and actions. When a man loves you, you won’t need to hear the words because you will just know.

1.  He Treats You Well

A guy who loves you is considerate of your feelings, needs and desires. He makes them as important as his desires and needs. He is concerned with your well-being and will do things to make your life better, sometimes going out of his way to do so. Not only does he treat you well, he is also good to your family and friends.

2.  He Is Generous With His Time

He doesn’t let too much time go by without seeing you. When he is available, he wants to be with you and chooses to spend his time with you. If you’re in a long distance relationship, he is spending time with you whenever your schedules allow. And you are together during major holidays such as Valentine’s Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s Eve.

3.  He Makes You A Priority

You are at the forefront of his mind and he maintains contact in between the times you see each other. He considers you when making decisions and is considerate about doing things you want to do. When speaking, he uses “we” instead of “I”, and includes you in his future plans.

4.  He Cares For You
A guy who loves you is genuinely happy for you when good things happen to you. He is compassionate when you’re going through challenges. This guy is there for you in the good and not so good times. He thinks about you and surprises you with tokens of affection outside of your birthday, Christmas and Valentine’s Day. He will also challenge you by calling you out on stuff to help you become a better person.

5.  He Wants People To Know About You

He is affectionate with you in public by holding your hand, putting his arm around you and/or hugging you. He is proud to be with you and has introduced you to his family and friends. He brings you to family functions and get-togethers with friends, and takes you to company events.

6.  He Treats Your Relationship With Integrity

He is trustworthy and loyal to you and your relationship. He is upfront with you about his past girlfriends and skeletons in his closet. He does what he says and will let you know if he’s not able to. When issues come up, he is willing to work through them. Although he isn’t perfect, he tries to be a better man.

7.  He Wants The Best For You

A guy who loves you encourages you to do things you love, even if it means doing these things without him. He wants you to spend time with family and friends. He encourages you to find and live your passions, knowing that if you are happy and engaged with life, you’ll be happy and engaged in your relationship with him.

8. He Teases You 
He Teases You in a good way. He can make fun of you in a way that makes you laugh, not in a way that makes you cry quietly in the bathroom later.

How to Handle Being Attracted to Someone Else

No matter how much you love your significant other and how committed you are to the relationship, you might, at some stage, find yourself attracted to someone else. Such feelings can be very unsettling and guilt-inducing, and may cause you to question yourself and your relationship.

The first thing to keep in mind when something like this happens is not to beat yourself up over feelings that you can’t control. You’re human and you can’t help it if someone has caught your eye. What’s really going to be important is how you act and what you choose to do about your attraction.

If you’re  attracted to someone else, then there are three main courses of action that you can take:

1) When you shouldn’t feel guilty or worry too much

Developing an attraction to someone else does not, by any means, have to spell doom for your relationship. If it hasn’t diminished your feelings for your partner and if you have absolutely no intention of ever being unfaithful, then it likely won’t affect your relationship much.

If you simply think that someone else is a “hotie” and enjoy seeing them from time to time, whether it be at work, at school, or wherever it is that you know them from, then leave it at that. It would probably be in your best interest not to pursue spending any additional time with them, but you don’t have to run away in fear every time you see them.

If you are secure, confident, and happy in your relationship, then chances are that your attraction will simply fade over time.

2) When you should take steps to put a stop to your attraction

Maybe you have no intention of cheating on your significant other and you are still very much in love with them, but thoughts of your attraction preoccupy your mind to the extent that it actually begins to take a toll on your relationship. Perhaps you don’t give your partner as much attention as you used to, or you simply feel too much guilt whenever you are with them.

In this case, you will likely need to do more than just hope that your attraction fades with time, and actually take some steps to ensure that it does. The best way to put a stop to your feelings is to distance yourself from the person that you are attracted to. Try to avoid places that you know they will be and to keep from having too much contact with them.

Avoiding your attraction like this may be difficult, particularly if the two of you work or study closely together, but you need to be willing to create this distance if you want your attraction to stop impacting your relationship.

3) When you should honestly reconsider your relationship

If your attraction develops to the point where you think you might be unfaithful if the opportunity to cheat ever presented itself, then you need to take a long and honest look at whether or not you should stay in your relationship anymore.

Make sure that you put an end to things with your partner before pursuing anything with the person you are attracted to. Ending your relationship will likely be messy and difficult, but failing to be honest and potentially cheating on your significant other would be even more difficult for everyone involved.

It’s rarely fun to develop strong feelings for someone else while already in a relationship, but if these feelings become too deep to ignore, then it could be a sign that your relationship isn’t right for you anymore.If you’re brave enough to be honest with yourself and with your partner, then, no matter how difficult the process may be, things will eventually sort themselves out and you will be much happier for it in the long run.

36 QuestionsThat can Make You Fall in Love With Anyone?

One lab. Two people. Forty-five minutes. Thirty-six questions. Four minutes of gazing into each other’s eyes… and one deep, lasting connection.

Admittedly, it sounds like a ridiculous recipe for falling in love. But could it actually work? Well, according to research conducted more than 15 years ago by Arthur Aron, PhD, a professor of psychology at Stony Brook University, it did work.

The method was simple: Over the course of 45 minutes, Aron had his subjects ask each other 36 questions (full list below!). Each one gets progressively more personal, beginning with, “Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?” before probing under the surface into treasured memories, deepest wishes, the state of the other person’s relationship with Mom, even the role of love and affection in the other person’s life.52 sets of male and female strangers and 19 sets of all-female strangers together in a lab and caused them to grow significantly closer by way of the equation noted above.

Want to test it yourself? Find a comfortable spot, settle in with someone you’d like to get closer with, and get started answering these questions from  Arthur Aron's study.

1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?

2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?

3. Before making a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you’re going to say? Why?

4. What would constitute a perfect day for you?

5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?

6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you choose?

7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?

8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.

9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.

12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one quality or ability, what would it be?

13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?

14. Is there something that you’ve dreamt of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?

15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

16. What do you value most in a friendship?

17. What is your most treasured memory?

18. What is your most terrible memory?

19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?

20. What does friendship mean to you?

21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?

22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.

23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?

24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?

25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “we are both in this room feeling…”

26. Complete this sentence “I wish I had someone with whom I could share…”

27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.

28. Tell your partner what you like about them: Be honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.

29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.

30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?

31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.

32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?

33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?

34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?

35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?

36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.

Good luck!

7 difference between a Single and a Taken Guy

7 difference between a Single and a Taken Guy

There are two distinct types of men in this world: single men and those who are coupled up.
Tell me which of these are true or apply to you....hahahaha

One major difference? The judgement calls they make on facial hair and general grooming...except she's into the bearded gang:



 The number of friend requests they accept from random women they only vaguely remember from college:






The time you spend on call when you are "with" her increases exponentially



The "team bro" loses a member.....partially



In the cinema your sitting position take a wonderful angle



Eheenn......You are ....financially lower



More Wine......Less Beer as a responsible guy on val's day




Guys add yours if you think i missed something.....Ladies,confirm for us..:)

Characteristics of the ?? Perfect Woman??

Characteristics of the ?? Perfect Woman??

First of all the most important thing to know is that NOBODY is PERFECT! because, like men, every woman has strengths and weaknesses; if you're looking for a woman to build a meaningful relationship with, always keep this in mind. You need to ask yourself what character flaws you are willing to deal with and help the woman improve on, if she's willing, and what flaws you won't accept. Another thing you shouldn't do is choose a woman based just on her looks, her personality or even how she makes you feel. Instead, choose someone with integrity and loyalty. So now we have that "outta" the way let look at what we manage. :)

Honesty and Loyalty 

o The right woman is honest and loyal to you. If a woman is honest enough to admit that her mistakes, this shows she can be honest about her mistakes in life. If a woman can stick by her good friend even if he is permanently disfigured due to an accident, this shows her commitment and loyalty. 

 Self-Respect and Integrity 

o You first want to choose a woman who has self-respect and integrity. If the woman you're interested in values herself enough to not allow you to treat her harshly and will tell you when you're doing this, she is someone who would make a good partner. If you have a female friend who lives as she believes and is not wishy-washy about her beliefs, she also is probably a good choice. 

Physical Maintenance 

o Attractiveness also is a factor to consider when choosing the right woman. While the woman doesn't have to be the carbon copy of a well-known female celebrity, she should care about her looks and be well-groomed. For example, if a woman often goes out with her hair messy or with clothes on that do not flatter her figure, this could mean that she doesn't put much effort into grooming. However, it's possible for you to date a woman in this situation and motivate her to care about grooming. 

Shared Interests and Values 

o It's also important to date a woman who shares some similar interests and values as yourself. For example, if you value marriage and children, then you should establish a relationship with a woman who wants the same thing. If you prefer a woman who is socially and politically aware of important issues in the world, look for someone who at least has an interest in learning about these things.

No one is perfect,but some people may be better for you than others.

Embarrassing Sex Questions Answered

CAN I BREAK HIS PENIS?
The uncomfortable truth?: sort of. The penis isn’t a bone so it can’t technically break. But you can fracture it during vigorous sex by accidentally bending it. It’s a serious and painful injury that will involve a few awkward conversations in the ER and almost immediate surgery.


DOES THAT FARTING SOUND HAPPEN TO EVERYONE?
It’s called queefing and it’s what happens when air trapped in the vagina during sex tries to escape. But there’s no need to be embarrassed — it happens to everyone. And if it makes you feel any better, the Ying Yang Twins even wrote a lyric about it.

IS IT PECULIAR IF I PREFER FLYING SOLO?
Not at all. In fact, studies show that women in relationships fly solo more often than women who are single. But if you pass up on the partner thing more often than not, it could be an issue. Invite him to join the fun sometimes so he doesn’t feel left out.

IS THAT SMELL NORMAL?
Chances are the answer is “yes,” especially if your vaginal odor hasn’t changed. Years of feminine odor commercials have made women self-conscious about their natural odors. But physicians say that chances are that he doesn’t notice it — or finds it extremely attractive.

DOES WATCHING GIRL-ON-GIRL ACTION MAKE ME GAY?
Not if you like men, it doesn’t. It’s very common for women to turn on girl-on-girl porn. And it doesn’t necessarily mean you want to act it out any more than any of the other acts you’ve seen on film.

IS IT NORMAL TO LOSE INTEREST IN THE MIDDLE?
It happens to a lot of women. Your engines are all revved up in the beginning, but they peter out before the finish line. Don’t be afraid to ask him to get your motor started again or lend yourself a helping hand.

HOW DO I KEEP IT TIGHT?
After a few minutes of friction and bumping around, it’s natural for things to loosen up. If you want to keep it tight, try some Kegel exercises. They’ll not only keep things snug, they’ll give you better orgasms.

ARE THERE SUPPOSED TO BE BUMPS ON IT?
Not all bumps are abnormal. The could be an allergic reaction, normal fibrous tissue or ingrown hairs. But it’s always a good idea to ask. And if the answer contains the phrase “I don’t know,” be prepared to leave. Some lumps can be signs of STIs.

HOW DO I TELL HIM HIS TECHNIQUE IS TERRIBLE?
It doesn’t have to be embarrassing. Focus on one critique at a time, and keep it positive. Instead of saying “don’t pinch those so hard,” tell him that you really like it when he’s gentle. Once he improves in one area, move on to the next.

WHAT IF HE’S TOO BIG?
There are things you can do when it looks too big.The key is speed. He’s got to spend a lot of time warming you up before you’re ready to go. Then, try getting on top. It will give you more control in an overwhelming situation

AM I SUPPOSED TO BE THIS… WET
Moisture levels vary from woman to woman and situation to situation. There’s nothing wrong with a little or a lot.

WHY DON’T I ORGASM DURING SEX?
You’re not alone. A lot of women have trouble reaching their goals through penetration only.
It could be that he’s not hitting the right spot, or your sexual peak could be a few years away. Until you figure it out, have him apply a few of the tricks you use when you’re flying solo.
But if you’re not reaching your destination during your alone time, it could be time to talk to your doctor about possible medical issues).

DID I JUST PEE?
Releasing a lot of moisture during sex is called female ejaculation or “squirting” if you want to use the street name. There can be a lot of it, but it’s not urine and actually a sign that he’s been doing a really good job.

WHY DOES IT FEEL LIKE I HAVE TO PEE?
It’s actually a good thing. Feeling the urge means he’s hitting your G-spot and a climax is on the way. So don’t be afraid to relax. It’s unlikely that you’ll spring a leak — unless your bladder is really full.

 More SOCIAL EXPERIMENTS: Sex in the movies Real or fake ?http://targetdex.blogspot.com/2015/01/actors-who-had-real-sex-on-set-and.html

10 Reasons Why PeopleCheat

A sad reality that many must face in relationships is that we can’t control what our mates do. Even though you might do your best to fulfill their needs, ultimately it’s up to them if they’re going to be faithful. But, if fidelity is simple as it seems? Is it merely just a choice, or are some people more prone to infidelity? Is there a science behind it?

Well, thanks to the study of many scientists, psychologists, and sociologist, I brought you all 14 studies that dissected fidelity and the myths along with it. Remember, that with science all these things are theories, and it’s not indicative of every person that you date/marry. But, the more you know

1. The “I DIDN’T SEE IT LIKE THAT” Mindset

With the constant knowledge of things that are bad for us, do you ever wonder why some people still smoke, obsessively drink, or binge, knowing what the consequences are? People are able to do these things due to something called “cognitive dissonance.” This is the act of separating the wrong that you do, and either trivializing it, or justifying it so you don’t seem as bad. This behavior is very prominent in cheaters.

An experiment was published in January 2013 that proved that when people were made to feel bad about their past cheating, they saw it as such. Whereas, if their behavior was rationalized, they were able to separate themselves from their own bad behavior leading them with thoughts like: cheating is bad, but I’m not, because I’m a good person… even though I cheated.

2. THEY HAVE AN ADDICTION

Within the last decade, people have been using the fact that they have a sex addiction to justify their infidelity. While some have been skeptical, it actually is an issue for some. Some people who have sex addictions allow themselves to do very unhealthy things for themselves and relationships, and there are recovery facilities for those who suffer.

See how people become attracted to each other 

http://targetdex.blogspot.com/2015/01/the-science-behind-male-and-female.html

3. PEOPLE FIND THEM DESIRABLE (DEPENDING ON GENDER)

An experiment was recently done by recovery.org entitled “To Catch a Cheater.” They set up a number of fake profiles on dating sites and created them with a certain level of fidelity. Through that, they saw that their fake women profiles who were interested in cheating were hit up more by men. Where as the fake male profiles of cheaters were more chastised.

This pointed to the fact that some men merely want just sex, rather than a relationship. That’s why the men in the study sought out these “taken” women.

4. DISAPPOINTMENT

According to “dating” site AshleyMadison.com, a site that helps married people to find people to cheat on their spouses with, found that their busiest days for signup were the day before Valentine’s Day (for men) and the day after for women. According to the site:

“While February 13th — also known as Mistress Day — saw a 271% increase in signups, there was actually a 314% decrease in signups on Valentine’s Day itself. The most prolific traffic came the day after Valentine’s as 439% more people signed up to find what’s missing in their marriage.

The huge spike in signups on the 15th was mostly driven by married women: their membership increased by a whopping 977%.”

5. IT’S IN YOUR GENES

The good people at Scientific American tried to find a correlation between genetics and infidelity. They found that men who had a variant of the chemical vassopressin (which is dominant in voles) have a tendency to have problems of fidelity and in relationships in general.

Further research from the Binghamton University, State University of New York also did a study and found that people who had a variation of the chemical DRD4 had a tendency to engage in activities of infidelity. These people also tended to be more open to social situations and taking risks.


6. THEY HAVE A NEED FOR CONTROL

When powerful people are caught cheating, the rationale that usually comes is the fact that the person’s ego was so big that they felt that they were untouchable. While that’s probably true, another study brought in the idea of control.

If a person is powerful, that person has a tendency to be in control of certain aspects of their lives, namely the talent that got them their power. Though the person might not actively sit down and plan to cheat, they might go through with it for the fact that they believe that they can control the situation.

7. PERFORMANCE ANXIETY

In a study conducted by researchers at Indiana University,Bloomington and the University of Guelph in Ontario found that a reason why some people cheat is due to stress of dealing with the anticipation of having to perform for their mate sexually. With a person that they’re not in a relationship with, they tended to not care as much about meeting that person’s needs, allowing them to be more open sexually:

“It may be that individuals with arousal difficulties feel less pressure to perform sexually with a partner to whom they are not emotionally committed or in a relationship context which is not long- term. In addition, it may be that some individuals want to evaluate if, or believe that, their arousal difficulty is specific to their primary relationship and engage in infidelity for that reason.”

8. ??TO FIX THEIR MARRIAGE (?)

The site AshleyMadison.com decided to ask its users (which are married, by the way) what attempts they made to try to save their marriage, and apparently cheating on their mate was one of the last straws. I guess, in some way it’s a cry for help/attention. (Shoulder shrug)?

“People don’t pursue an affair at the drop of a hat. We always knew anecdotally that people used AshleyMadison.com to stay in their marriage,” said Noel Biderman, CEO, AshleyMadison.com. “Married people know that sex isn’t the most important thing in a marriage, and they aren’t going to simply or quickly leave. They also aren’t willing to settle for abstinence for the rest of their lives, so that’s when they look for an external solution.


9. MORE MONEY, MORE OPPORTUNITY

The exact same study proved that men who made more money, regardless of whether or not they had the same level of education, religious beliefs and social status would cheat if the opportunity presented itself.
The more a man tended to make, coupled with increased opportunity, and lastly an inflated sense of self, the more likely he would cheat. But don’t feel defeated, ladies! According to Stephanie Coontz, who also participated in the study, she had these words of encouragement:
“The take-home message for me out of this is more encouraging for women: Yes, there are guys who still take advantage. But if you are married to a guy who does work, shares your values and background, is close to the same age, and is a good partner, you should not worry at all if you make more than he does!” Coontz added.

10.BLINDED BY BEAUTY

When a person has a risk-taker personality, it seems to be heightened when they are around someone they find attractive.

“As it turns out, men may become blind to risk when an attractive woman enters the picture. One 2008 study found that men who played blackjack after seeing beautiful female faces took more risks than men who played the game after seeing unattractive faces.”

5 ways to Make a Guy Interested in You: For the ladies

When you like a guy, but you aren't sure whether he is interested in you as well, it can be disappointing and frustrating. Rather than just waiting for him to start to like you, there are some things that you can do to try to make him see you the same way you see him. However, you should remember that you can never make someone like you who simply doesn't, but you can put your best foot forward.

1  Make sure that you are really interested in him before you devote time to trying to make him interested in you. Many women become focused on looks, but you should also be interested in his personality, hobbies and other aspects of his life.


2   Behave confidently when you talk to him. Men are attracted to confident women, so don't make disparaging remarks about yourself. However, you should not be cocky. Speak directly and honestly about yourself, your career or school and other aspects of your life.

3    Be yourself when you are around him. Many women are guilty of trying to make a guy like them by trying to become who they think he will like. Don't pretend to like things he likes or change your personality to be like the person he used to date. If you do those things, he will eventually find out that the person you were pretending to be is not who you actually are.


4  Ask him questions about things in which he is interested. Show him that you are interested in him, along with the things that he likes to do. Do not fake the interest or pretend to like the same things; simply be honest.


5 Avoid becoming obsessed with making him like you. That can result in you trying too hard, which will not be attractive. If he does not seem to be responding to you, let it go and move on to the next guy.